I want to break up with dating!

Description An Ode to Emily
More Than Meets The Eyes
Should I Tell Her How I Feel?
The Play Date
Dogs, Cats, and the Art of Dating: Lessons from the Cab Ride
The Colorado Connection That Could Never Be
When Love Feels Like a DIY Project: The Fixer-Upper Dilemma
Why Men Marry Some Women and Not Others
Should You Settle?
Is There Hope For The Gender Gap?
Cheating is a Cop Out
The Dance of Second Chances

Strange way to start only my 2nd blog, right… I hear you asking, “You do know you agreed to blog on datingthoughts.com, right Ms. WS?” Yes, yes, I know. But, dating does get old when you’ve done it for 10 or 15 years, right?

So what’s my point then?

I’m saying it to put it out there, because I know a lot of people feel this way from time to time. I have to take breaks –because I’ve just gotten out of a relationship and I need some time before I jump back in…because, after awhile, too many first dates get draining and discouraging…. because it seems like all the guys I am interested in are somehow not right and all the guys I’m not interested in are the ones that are available. Yes, I get tired of dating.

And, maybe it’s the ugly truth about dating and I shouldn’t say it, but it’s true…

And whenever I finally admit that I’m ready to break up with dating, that’s when the advice usually starts. There are those well meaning people who say to me, “you must just be doing the wrong things”? Easy to say when you have been married since college or met your significant other on a drunken club night when you were 24….

Then they say,” well maybe if you take a break and stop looking, the right person will show up.” If everyone did that, how would anyone ever start dating? And does that really happen? I know just as many women who were on a mission to meet their husband, and they did.

And then finally, they throw up their hands and say to me, “Just keep at it. It will happen for you too.”

So, where does Ms Window Shopper go from here? When dating seems like a waste of time? When it seems the universe is shouting at the top of the lungs “GIVE UP?”

First, I remember to stop getting hung up on “the things they say”. Don’t get me wrong. I think it is very helpful to share your dating successes, failures and frustrations with others – you’ll go crazy if you don’t. But I know I’ll also go crazy if I let myself get carried away with every little piece of advice and dating “theory” that is hurled my way.

Second, I remind myself of what is great about dating. 3 things usually work for me:

(1) Watching movies with happy relationship endings – the classics– Jerry Maguire, Singles, Reality Bites – or maybe a more recent one – Juno.

(2) Hanging out with that perfect couple – you all know one. That couple that when you watch them interact, it reminds you not to settle for just any old relationship _ or not relationship at all.

(3) Going out and forcing myself to talk to people in informal situations. Unfortunately this is usually in a bar, but the formality of a first date can sometimes be the reason I am in a rut. Break out of it and remember dating is sometimes a crazy, loony crapshoot that you can’t truly plan.

So, maybe I won’t break up with dating – maybe I won’t even take a break. Maybe I just have to remember that even though sometimes it sucks, other times it’s the best thing ever….
Début de l'événement 08.01.2023
Fin de l'événement 08.01.2023